| I guess... |
[Jul. 30th, 2009|09:50 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | sweet/soft | ] |
it's not such a secret, but...
____I wanna be yr muse. |
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| give me rainbows |
[Jul. 13th, 2009|08:22 pm] |
{I wrote this a while ago, don't remember date}
The sky is milky soft purple with a haunting moon placed high, two twins stars hang from the corner. Such a stillness, the sound of far away traffic soothes like waves.
I think about my white rabbit. Wild days, pretending we were mermaids and taking off our swimsuits in the waves. She sent me a photo that burned itself into my memory. When we were young I called her griffin. It fits. She once said "we are both mythological creatures that will never be fully understood".
I think about my vampire. The one who leaves me with bruises and swollen wrists every time. The one covered in my blood, head back, laughing. The one I can't seem to keep out.
I think about my big sister, her perfect breasts and pointy little teeth. The way I feel her through walls, and she knows when I'm crying.
I think about my androgynous angel. I wish he would dress like a girl, I'd take him on a date and kiss the lipstick off.
I'm laying on the floor, I have a bow in my hair, my shirt is slipping off my shoulders. There is smoke here but I'm out of cigarettes. I keep having to catch my breath. Time is so slow here, feels like I'm swimming through honey and ash.
The morning is coming with all of it's noise. I want to tip toe into your bed but I don't know if I'm allowed anymore. |
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| insatiable |
[Jul. 13th, 2009|06:44 pm] |
6/1/09
Yr branches shiverrr hard
As I weave the metal thread through the petals
Crushing soft skin, releasing aromas like:
milky rose water
burning insect parts
lonely blankets
black swan opium
wet chammomile bandage
I'm lapping at the seepage
with rough kitten tongue
Drinking it up like honey nectr
Cause I'm so so thirsty
Yr eyes are little moons in orbit
smeared with glitter ash
they're making me spin
Nearly choking on vibration
I want more. |
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| XM |
[Jul. 13th, 2009|06:43 pm] |
5/20/09
I feel yr lushious anemones
dripping wet neon prisms
sensual machine purrs
metallic flesh on flesh
pressed against hard surface
yr lips blossom like over ripe roses
I bite the petals they bruise
plush punctures
yr eyes are fire crystal stars
I see psychic passion
when they flutter
and when you cry
I make wishes on yr tears
but they evaporate so quick bby
cause yr temper is hot
hot hot
oh, my mechanical little kitten
tear me down again
oh, I see you
and
oh yes!
I feel you
thrashing and catching
beads of sweat
on yr silver snake tongue |
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| glittr & ash |
[Jul. 13th, 2009|06:38 pm] |
I fell out of LJ land..
but I'm kinda back. I think.
I have a lot I need to write down.
:} |
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| XZYMHR |
[Jun. 16th, 2009|01:00 am] |
bby was always in her garden.
she sucked on flower petals, tasted pretty poison.
bby had her own words she made up, almost a whole language.
the ash fairies taught her things,
their skin was covered in glass and little feathers in matted golden hair.
they told bby not to eat the blood meat, it was rotten.
they told her she could live off the flowers and black eyed berries that stained her little fingers.
sometimes she would squeeze the juice and apply to lips & cheeks.
she felt like a rosy princess then.
but her favorite was digging her hands into the warm earth
she wanted to go deeper and deeper but felt afraid of the dirt creatures that might become angry at human-girl intruders.
bby became translucent and pale as fall turned to winter.
the fairies still spoke to her, but they shivered so hard in the wind, they sounded like broken chimes.
she felt like her eyelids were heavy diamonds, but her body felt so light!
her vision became blurry prisms.
they told her, do not be afraid little bby, we will guide you.
soon you will be with us.
the grown ups spoke amongst themselves of tubes and needles
but bby knew they could never understand the language
their voices sounded deep underwater
her bones became filled with light and oxygen and her eyes were too heavy to keep open.
the fairies whispered, voices like crystal smoke, come closer, bby
come be with us.
the soft snow fell and they put bby deep in the earth, it was so warm there.
she felt calm and safe.
when spring came, dripping with honey scents and little vines, bby sprouted from the soil.
fragile limbs out stretched, the fairies pulled on her small branches
and soon she was in full bloom.
in celebration of her becoming, they broke open berries and painted her cheeks and petals.
they crowned her with a wreath of spider silk, moss, and feathers.
bby was the princess of the fairies,
she shimmered like amythest glitter in the sun.
her roots could go deeper and deeper
there was nothing to be afraid of now. |
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| quickly... |
[Feb. 1st, 2009|02:40 pm] |
I'm in colorado being a vagabond
next utah and new mexico to see friends
then maybe east coast....?
I have somewhere to stay in hollywood but I must admit, I miss SF.
we will see.............. |
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| voyeur... |
[Dec. 18th, 2008|03:57 pm] |
something I am working on + tarot (early xmas gift from beetle)
 |
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| oh really |
[Dec. 4th, 2008|05:59 pm] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | cocorosie | ] |
True creation is not psychological vomit. It is allowing oneself to become a channel, open. To drop the ego and realize you are not separate from the all. When this happens, everything becomes art. Every moment is full!
I'm excited that the moon is swelling again, I feel much better now. Everything is very exciting. |
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| Kaiulani & Kehualani |
[Dec. 3rd, 2008|10:58 pm] |
My little sister had a dream that I was being sucked into a vortex. She cried and screamed because she knew I was dying, but then she realized I was going to heaven and knew it was okay somehow.
She also had a dream that I was Hannah Montana a few weeks ago. |
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| F2. |
[Oct. 20th, 2008|12:53 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  artistic | ] |
Here I am....
back in the city, home.
<3 |
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| light leaks, flesh shows through |
[Sep. 13th, 2008|08:46 pm] |
As she spoke, her orange moon eyes dilated and glazed over. She was finally still.
She Listened.
"we all have our cages. At least you are safe."
They sat in the gentle silence for seven seconds.
I cried then. I tried to hide my tears, but they both saw.
What they couldn't see were the seams stretching, a few popping and tearing.
Later the sun melts into the watercolor sea and the stars come out to meet us.
There are a few that fly past us, almost too fast to catch.
"what a tease". We laugh... and laugh. Also more tears, but everything is accepted in this place.
It's all strange. And beautiful. Our lives are so similar to the orange-eyed prophet.
Maybe one day they will understand my tears. |
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| and all these moments will be lost in time... |
[Jan. 6th, 2008|10:12 pm] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | interpol "pioneer to the falls" | ] |
a shared sense of something to come
but then we recoil, shift our eyes
and look away
there is so much to look at, to look through...
but nothing to touch.
sitting high above
i've create thousands of paper cranes
one for each moment, each memory
i kiss each and then let it fly
watching them leave poetry trails
they'll travel
all
the
way
to you. |
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| flickrrr. |
[Sep. 26th, 2007|04:17 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  dead | ] |
..... I've made an account with Flickr to have a place to better organize my photos, and also document my art, makeup, and clothing I make.
feel free to check it out or add me to your friends if you have one:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/aesthetic_suicide/ |
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| ... |
[Sep. 15th, 2007|03:04 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  cold | ] |
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| mmm |
[Jul. 21st, 2007|01:30 am] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | a lake | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | alive | ] |
I thrive
on a full diet
of
stars |
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lux_zombie's journal